Feminine Fire Within

There are times when embracing the Divine Feminine, I feel fierce; a fierceness that burns in my Soul and gets in my bones. This fire consumes me, but it does not harm me. I have been through another rapid acceleration into my truth, and that normally leaves me wobbly and disconnected.

But this time, I am seeing things so clearly.

This fire has renewed my vision and burned away any disillusion I was experiencing. It brought back my deep passion to the point where I embrace and celebrate my feminine body and awaken all my senses. To feel something other than fatigue and dullness and hiding myself behind a mask of familiarity and comfort.

My sensual body is awake, my spiritual body is awake, my emotional body is awake.

I am fire.

I am fierce.

I am feminine.

I am spiritual.

I am sensual.

I am Sacred.

I am Woman.

 

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Pulling The Thread

A large part of my journey in the beginning was a process of undoing. A tapestry of my existence was woven that carried stories that were obscure and often times false. They were stories I had been told to believe were truth, but these were not my truths. They were candy-coated tales of what I experienced as told by those who gained from these tales. They were carefully woven and crafted to reflect a truth not of my own, used to keep me under the power and control of other people.

Healing these wounds meant I would need to explore the truths-my truths- without the manipulation of my memories and experiences. The threads of each story became loose- and it was up to me to unravel the tapestry of each one. It was within my power to now pull that thread and undo the carefully crafted stories that lay within.

And yet, even with this realization, I hesitated with each pull. This is what I knew, this is what I was comfortable with…why would I want to undo this foundation that was created for me? It was safe here, it was comfortable here, it was numb here. But something deep within me desired to pull that thread. I desired to create a tapestry that reflected me and my truth, not a false representation of my life.

Facing these truths took the power and influence away from those who only sought to protect themselves and keep their false realm of power. With each pull of the thread, I took away their power over me and gave it back to its rightful owner…me.

And as empowering as this was, it also exposed my vulnerability. Reclaiming myself and my journey called upon everything within me to keep going. To keep pulling that thread and undoing the carefully created stories. The more that was revealed, the more that could be healed. And the more that was healed, the stronger I became. And not just stronger…I could see my true self begin to emerge.

This journey I am on has brought me to the depths of who I am. It has helped me see and honor my Sacredness. It has helped me see that I am not flawed or unworthy or unloved. It has brought me to my Soul family. It has led me to create a movement of Sacred, Soulful Women honoring themselves.

Through this journey and this experience, the Soulfully Embraced Woman was birthed. I learn more about her each day through myself and through other women on their journey. The depths of who she is continues to fascinate and captivate me. She is within us and she is all around us. She is an embodiment of the Divine Feminine within each of us.

I am grateful to be on this journey. I am grateful that I answered the call of my Soul. I am grateful to be the vessel through which the Soulfully Embraced Woman was birthed through. I am grateful I pulled the thread that began this journey. I am grateful to be creating a tapestry that reflects my truth and my journey.

 

 

The Spiral Journey Within

I was so used to a linear path to achieve my goals. Here is point A, and there is point B. And these are the steps I need to take to get to point B. No room for errors, no room for exploration, no room for creative expression. Sure, I would reach my goals, but once there, it didn’t feel like such a big deal after all that work. I pushed and strived and forced my way through to reach that goal. I felt accomplished, and I also felt unfulfilled.

When I began my journey inward, I expected it would be the same methodology as I used before. I set up a timeline and a starting point, and I began. The thing about this type of journey…it is messy. There is no “perfect path” to follow. This path is one that no one else has ever been on before.

Why?

Because our journey and the paths along our journey are unique to us. We are going into uncharted and untouched territories that have much to be cleared and removed before we can see where we need to go.

And this path is not linear, it is circular. We may need to pass by one area over and over until we have sufficiently cleared the way. There may be extra rubble and rocks with each layer of debris we remove. We move in a spiral. This is not a path across, it is path within. It is a journey into the depths of our being. When the way begins to clear, we will find more that we need to move out of our way.

On my own journey within, each layer revealed a deeper truth, and sometimes a deeper, often forgotten experience. Old wounds would show up once they had the space to do so. In the beginning of my journey, this was enough to make me want to jump off the path and go back to the safe, preset  point A to point B path. Back to feeling unfilled and stifled. With each turn of the spiral, this became less and less of a struggle once I learned to surrender to and honor my path.

As my journey deepened, I began to feel a deeper sense of my Sacredness. I began to see and feel things differently. I began to notice the beauty around me….and the beauty within me. Where I once devalued myself,¬† I now deeply loved myself. Where I once gave all of myself to please others, I now fill my vessel first and give from my overflow. Where I once took parts of myself off or hid them to please others, I was now shining and sharing my own light and truth.

I now embrace this spiral path that holds the deep mysteries within.

Softening Into Surrender

Along my journey, I found the deepest healing and transformation happened when I allowed myself to soften. This was not something that came naturally for me, as I leaned heavily into the masculine way of being during my retail career. I was always the doer, the achiever, the keep-moving-forward-no-matter-what woman, the woman with walls to keep people out, not expressing my emotions…I was hard, I was focused, I moved up the ranks…but inside I was stifled, unfulfilled, hurting.

The first few steps of my journey, I held tight to these walls. Walls that were created for my protection were what prevented me from healing. In order for me to heal, I needed to soften. While I was keeping out all that I feared would harm me, I also kept out that which could heal me. Love, creativity, forgiveness, compassion. I was keeping out the feminine essence that I needed to embrace. An embrace of deep love and understanding, coming from the deep wells within my Sacred Vessel.

Softening, surrendering, and deepening were terrifying to me. I could not understand or even comprehend that toughening up and shutting down my emotions were doing more harm than good. I was not fully living. I was merely existing. I was holding my own self back and down while blaming everyone else for my then-current situations. The power I thought I was preserving and protecting I was actually giving it away and replacing it with bitterness, anger, and suppression.

This began to change when I began to soften into the Divine Feminine. I began to feel something stir inside me, an awakening of a part of myself that had long been dormant. It was a loving presence. She was calm, she was balanced, she was compassionate. She placed a silent invitation on my heart to come and rest in Her presence. It felt welcoming and it felt warm. I would make my way to Her, but I would first have to remove the layers that kept her hidden.

This journey within called to me, only getting stronger the more I resisted. Once you are awakened to the hidden parts of yourself, and you feel a connection to something waiting to be explored and excavated, it stays with you. It asks you to allow yourself to open to its expansiveness. It asks you to be vulnerable and share your truth. It asks you to show yourself the love, forgiveness, and compassion you have denied yourself. It asks you to begin to live in a new way of being. It asks you to soften into surrender.

This, I would soon find, is the way of the Divine Feminine on my path of healing.

 

Return of Lovely Strength

Embraces, Lovelies.

Here I am, going back to my roots of the first blog I ever created. Lovely Strength. But she will not look the same this time. She is my mirror and my muse, and she has been with me throughout my journey of growth, transformation, healing, and becoming.

2017 was a year of rapid change and expansion, hurtling me into new roles, responsibilities, and remembrances. It was a year of deep exploration into myself, into my calling, and into my service to the world. It was a time of darkness, but not the kind most associate when they hear the word darkness. For in the darkness, we grow. We allow ourselves to root and ground ourselves in the fertile soil, gathering strength and nourishment for our inevitable breakthrough.

2018 is a year of reaping, of expanding, of becoming. We are immersing ourselves in all the last year prepared us for. We are ready to embrace and unite all parts of ourselves. We are ready to step up and step out into the unknown and surrender to the calling deep within our Souls.

For me, personally, I have embraced the light and the shadow within myself. I have been on a journey to reclaiming the Divine Feminine within myself and creating a beautiful union with the Divine Masculine that was already ever-so-present. I have answered the call of my Soul and continue to deepen my service to women (and men) desiring to embrace the Divine Feminine energy and embodiment within themselves.

Bringing this blog back brings me back to my roots, but as a different being than I was then. Through this blog, it is my desire and intention to share my journey of going inward and share what I find there. It will be multi-faceted, but its core will be exploring, embracing, and embodying the Divine Feminine.

And it is my hope you will desire to be a part of my journey deepening into the Feminine.